to know love

you

2009-06-15T17:18:00.004-04:00

you are.
a comforter. a comedian. an example of Christ.

you share.
your thoughts. your feelings. your life.
with me.

you keep me.
grounded. laughing. living life to the fullest.

you make.
strangers smile. others feel at ease. mistakes and are quick to ask for forgiveness.

you see.
the big picture. the beauty in nature. the importance of traditions.

you show me.
grace. love. God's heart where i don't always see it.

you think i'm.
better. prettier. smarter. more talented.
than i think i am.

you listen to me.
cry. vent. dream.

you bring.
spontanaeity. fun. relaxation.
into my life.

you know.
my strengths. my flaws. my heart.

you believe.
that you live with two princesses. that you can accomplish anything you set out to do. that God's love for you is real. and huge. and limitless.

you help me.
parent our daughter. clean our house. "close my windows".

you are.
my true love. my best friend. my husband.

i love YOU, charlie. thank you for the past 7 years of marriage. and the past 12 years of life together.

brought to you by the letter "p" & the number "30"

2009-05-20T15:20:00.013-04:00

Yesterday was my birthday. The big 3-0. I haven't really had the chance to sulk about leaving my 20's behind because of all the happy things this birthday's brought me.

party...
I actually started celebrating last month with my 90's dance party. My dear and slightly older (her birthday was in March) friend Whitney and I were co-celebrated by several friends at what basically turned out to be the party of the year. I mean what could be better than dancing under the stars, music reminiscent of our middle and high school days, a Chick-Fil-A nugget tray, "Cha Cha Slide" and "Soulja Boy" on repeat, and one of Millie's world-famous cakes? Nothing, I tell you. It was truly a winning combination. Thanks to Whit for breaking it down with me birthday style. Thanks to our sweet husbands for planning the event. Thanks to Millie for really planning the event (just kidding Charlie and Matt...I know it wouldn't have happened without your "vision"). Thanks to our wonderful friends who came and m.c. hammered the night away with us.

presents...
My birthday festivities continued this past weekend when my family got together for lunch, complete with homemade icecream. Yum! While we were in Greenville, one of my best friends, Sara, gave me her birthday gift. It is a photobook titled, "Thirty Reasons I Thank God You Are My Best Friend". It was definitely one of the most thoughtful gifts I've ever received. And 30 reasons are a lot of reasons. You try to think of 30 sincere things about one of your friends and see if you can do it. Betcha can't. But Sara's thoughtfulness abounds. She probably could have done 60 reasons. But, I bet she's glad I'm not 60. I am too, for that matter.

I was also surprised with a gift from one of my other best friends. My sister did it again...another huge bouquet of multi-colored roses delivered to me at work. They are so beautiful! And I am so grateful. For the roses, but especially for her. She also spoiled me with a shout-out on her blog yesterday...complete with her precious children singing "Happy Birthday" to me. Ya'll know I think she is amazing. And she comes home in just a few weeks!!

And to top it all off, my sweet husband gave me a gift that I have been hoping for for a long time. I didn't think I'd be getting one anytime soon, so this was quite a surprise. I am so excited...and he was just as excited to give it to me. Thank you, Charlie!

I received several other special gifts as well as cards, emails, texts, and messages that truly made me feel loved.

picnic & phoenix...
I know I am pregnant, but I think I ate for more than two yesterday. My day started out with a Chick-fil-A biscuit delivered by my sweet friend Amy--always a great way to start the day! Then, Melissa brought the kids to my school and we had a picnic lunch in the cafeteria. Melissa's homemade chicken salad and chocolate cupcakes surely put the school pizza to shame. She has always made sure I have special treats on my birthday. Last night Charlie and I got to go on a dinner date to Phoenix, one of my favorites--so yummy!

potty...
Well, it's hard to post without including a story about Maddie. In addition to all the gifts I received, she also got a package in the mail on my birthday. Her very own potty seat. It is very plush for extra bottom comfort. And it has ducks on it. And now Maddie can sit on the toilet without falling in. All that to say, it's pretty much the coolest thing she's ever seen. As soon as she opened it, she wanted to try it out. I put it on the downstairs toilet and she sat, smiling ear to ear. And she sat. And she sat. And she sat some more. But not without entertainment. She went through about 8 magazines from the basket in the bathroom, and whenever I stuck my head in to check on her she said "Not all done, Mommy. Not all done." In fact, once she even added, with her finger pointed toward the kitchen, "Go cook, Mommy." After about 15 minutes had passed, Charlie got home and she was excited all over again for him to see her sitting on the potty. Finally after about 5 more minutes, we hear, "All done, Daddy!" When Charlie went in to help her, he discovered that she had scooted off the toilet by herself and begun to pull her bloomers and skirt back up. And she had pee-peed! Well, not actually in the potty. More like right in front of the potty. On the floor. And on her clothes. And on her reading assortment she had tossed on the floor. Oh well...almost:-)

So, all in all, turning 30 hasn't been so bad. I am just so thankful for all the blessings in my life and the way God has expressed His love for me through the relationships He's given me. Those are definitely the best gifts.

thank you for the books, neen neen!

2009-05-06T20:25:00.001-04:00

jesus loves me...

2009-04-16T14:23:00.000-04:00

addendum

2008-11-21T18:03:00.002-05:00

So, a few of you have mentioned to me how funny you think the picture of my sister and me are in our Halloween costumes. This is not us, people! Didn't you read my post about how we would never wear such things? However, I have to admit, it would be pretty hilarious if this was us. Chewbacca and Yoda. Wow. So, no, we never did Star Wars. But, Jenny did do "Space." Seriously. I am determined to find poloroid evidence over Thanksgiving. Until then, may the force be with you.

costuming it up!

2008-11-02T21:25:00.011-05:00

How fun it is to wear a costume? To be something or someone that is not you for just a night. I remember the anticipation of Halloween every year...it wasn't that I had any special affinity for the holiday itself. I wasn't ever into scary movies or even the candy that much. But the costumes. Oh I was into the costumes. Probably partly because of my creative parents and grandpa. They always made sure I had an original costume in the age of the vinyl smock-style outfits with the plastic mask and the character's face on the front. A la...
I know several of you all had those, so, please don't get offended. But seriously...please tell me why anyone needs a face on their face and on their chest. I also loved the masquerade of performing. There's just something magical about eyelining those little tails on the corners of my eyes while wearing a very regal, very poofy tutu. And of course, Jenny and I spent countless hours playing dress up. I can't even begin to tell you how in-depth we went with some of our "shows". We're talking multiple acts, playbills, you get the picture. Since Jenny was six years my junior, I was often the director/producer/choreographer, and of course the co-star. Maybe someday I'll post some photos of us in all our grandeur.

So, I think it's safe to say that I will try to foster that in my daughter. Of course I want her to find contentment in the way God made her, but I hope she will use her imagination and creativity, not only to have fun, but also to dream big.

This year for Halloween, I still got to call the shots (I may not be so lucky next year). Her costume was a hand-me-down, but I fashioned the wig myself...this is the closest I come to any craft involving yarn/thread. I am including some a pic from last year too. Wow. She'll be printing playbills and directing shows before we know it.

"raggedy maddie"

2008

"the chicken"

2007

Also, this year's video footage was just as hilarious as last year's. I tried to post clips of the chaos from both years, but I couldn't get '07 to load. So here's 2008...Especially amusing is the chain reaction of crying babies. Note that Maddie is keeping her distance.

18 reasons

2008-11-07T23:39:00.004-05:00

I see my school number come up on my caller ID on a Friday evening. Straight to voicemail you go, school person! When I check my message I hear that it is Maria from our front office. She explains with a heavy accent, "Ms. Kelly, I am calling to tell you that you have a gift at school. Well, I don't want to tell you what the gift is, but I think I have to tell you that it is some flowers. In a box. Because I think that you need to come get the flowers so they won't die. OK--bye bye." A gift? Flowers? Delivered? I have been at a conference for the last part of this week, so I haven't been at school. Charlie, of course, knew that, so I knew they were not from him. As we drove over to my school this evening to pick up my "flowers in a box", I guessed aloud about who they could be from. My suspicions proved correct when I read the sweet card. My sister, Jenny, had sent them. Jenny, who, in case you have forgotten is doing missions in another country. Jenny, who despite the hours and energy she is putting into lesson plans, loving on her students, learning the language, ministering to her community, living in community with her roommates and coworkers, was intentional about finding a special way to encourage my heart. So, I used my flower-arranging skills (I just wrote that in my best Napoleon Dynamite impersonation, btw) and then took some pics of my gift.
Wait, there's more.

Told ya. Yeah, 18 total to be exact. So, in honor of my 18 beauties that are looking so cute in my entryway and kitchen, here are 18 reasons I love this girl:

1. She is probably the most selfless person I have ever met in real life.

2. She doesn't think this is true because she is probably the most humble person I have ever met in real life.

3. She always looks for the good in people. Always.

4. She is honest.

5. She has strong opinions about the stuff that matters. She is not afraid to share those opinions and always does so in a non-threatening, accepting way.

6. She has a heart for the poor. The ones who lack money, the ones who lack spirit, and the ones who lack both.

7. She listens without judgment.

8. She is a gifted dancer.

9. She has so much compassion and empathy that she feels way more people's hurts than just her own.

10. She loves my daughter so well.

11. She has learned how to pick on Charlie. And she loves him well too.

12. She is silly.

13. She knows my junk and loves me anyway.

14. She is creative.

15. She seeks to serve others.

16. She loves SYTYCD, singing praise songs, boy bands, Skittles, languages, french fries, live music, Diet Mt. Dew, learning about other cultures, having a tan, The Office, dangly earrings, , making crafty stuff for other people, dancing, the beach, and the mountains...just like me.

17. She is strong and brave.

18. She values every relationship she has. Especially the one she has with Christ.

If you know her, you know all this stuff is true. If you don't, betcha wish you did!

Now, since she's probably all bashful and kind of wishing I hadn't written all of those things about her, here's the other way I can say "thank you".

Some of the best from our fall "photo shoot"....

Love you, Jen. Love you Neen Neen.

partyin' girl

2008-09-15T21:36:00.008-04:00

No, your Google Reader does not deceive you. It's really me. Actually posting a post. Don't worry, I won't dwell too much on my inadequacies as a consistent blogger (I woudn't want to make my poor, neglected blog another empty promise)...or give you a play by play recap of the last couple months (that would be certain to only entertain readers with such names as "Momma Lu" and "Grannie Annie")...in fact, maybe I shouldn't be the one to write at all. Maybe I'll give the kid a turn...

hi. i'm maddie in case you didn't know.

who am i kidding? i know you totally know who i am.

i want to say thank you to my mommy for letting me have a turn. for the record, i can say "thank you." i cannot, however, say "mommy". nor do i even try. not anything even remotely close. i give her lots of hugs and kisses that make up for it, though.

i am not going to tell you about our fun summer. mommy promised a summer recap, so i'll let her tell you about it. it's ok that summer is long gone, mommy. (you are a busy woman.)

what i am going to tell you about is the great big celebration we went to last weekend. we drove 8 hours to get there! you can eat a lot of cheerios and read a lot of books and sing a lot of "E-I-E-I-O" in 8 hours!

the big celebration was for elizabeth's wedding. elizabeth is my daddy's only girl cousin. so this was a big deal. here is elizabeth with 7 of the 9 cousins--uncle jimmy could not come because of work & uncle wally had to leave early to take the sick ring bearer home:-( i think elizabeth is a beautiful princess!

we had a party every night we were there! i wondered if it was because people from ohio were more fun than people in north carolina. daddy said it was because it was the heritage family

the first party was at a big park full of old planes and trains and cars.

i got to ride on a train and uncle kirby gave me a real conductor hat! we had a competition between north carolina and texas bbq. i thought that the corn on the cob won. mommy and me danced and danced in our green dresses. don'tcha think she looks like a watermelon?! mmm, i do love watermelon!

the next party was just for us girls. a nice lady gave mommy's feet a bath while i got a great big remote all to myself! it was so much fun, only i couldn't ever find the tv and our chair was bumpy.

that night we got to dress fancy. don'tcha think we look fancy?

mommy told me that uncle kirby gave a speech that made daddy cry. something about how special little girls are. that must mean i am pretty special.

after that party, we went to another one. it was at uncle kirby and aunt rita's house. that night i slept in three different places. talk about confusing.

then came the big day! we did some park-exploring and some hotel pool swimming before we had to get fancy again. i liked to stick the very tiny tip of my big toe in and tell grandpa it was "hot."

my favorite part of the wedding was all of those rose petals. i decided i needed to start practicing if i am ever going to be a flower girl one day. that is one tough job. i also liked that big room upstairs that i got to run around in. and playing with my new friends, the flower girls (they were the ones that gave me the inside scoop on the whole operation). and the chicken fingers. mommy and daddy said they liked all the dancing. and having so much fun with the whole heritage family. thank you, kirby and rita, for so many fun times! i would like to come to one of your parties again soon. so please invite me...especially if you need someone to throw some petals around.

school's in

2008-07-22T13:46:00.004-04:00

Well, as I knew it would be, my summer has been a short one. But also a full one. And a really good one. I think going into it with few expectations of myself (usually my summer to do list spans a couple of notebook pages) due to the brevity of it was actually helpful. Although I am certainly not ready to end my summer vacation, and more specifically, end my full days spent with Madison and quite a few spent with Charlie, I am not facing this school year with the dread that so often accompanies the start back. Or with a bucket full of unmet expectations and unfinished projects. Not that there aren't a lot of those projects...they are definitely still there. But, I think with my mindset, I was able to focus on what was really more important rather than that ever-lingering list of shame. Rest. Adventure. Fun. Laughter. Time spent with the folks I love most in the world. Isn't that what summer should be about?

I promise to post a little summer re-cap soon...there are pics of Maddie that simply must be shared! But while I only have a few moments today between putting up bulletin boards and planning classroom guidance lessons, I thought I'd share the latest media spotlight on our school. This aired a few days ago.

Adios, Summer!

Bienvenidos School Year!

a greenville celebrity

2008-07-02T09:47:00.001-04:00

http://www.reflector.com/photos/mediahub/media/slideshow/index.jsp?tId=112229

she's #15.

thank you!

2008-07-13T10:49:00.004-04:00

our weekend away

2008-07-01T12:32:00.006-04:00

I had the pleasure of a weekend getaway to the Outer Banks with my sweet husband. We were celebrating our anniversary, which was actually almost 2 weeks ago...but, you know--better late than never--that's how we roll.

So, we always try to mix up things a little bit when we are visiting new places. Sometimes we do lots of people watching (and listening) and write down the funniest things we hear. Sometimes we play the game where you find everyone you can that you know...except the people you find are really not the people you know (for example, in case you ever want to play...you might say, "Hey, it's Charlie Heritage," upon sight of a tall, lanky, dark-haired, completely random guy. You really should try it.) This time though, we decided to give each place we visited a rating. Our rating system was based on three criteria: 1. atmosphere; 2. service; and 3. product (usually this was food, but in some cases it was, for example, history of human flight...that would be for the Wright Brothers Memorial in case you don't know your NC history). I won't give you the complete ratings list, but here are a few of the highlights (and lowlights):

Cape Hatteras Lighthouse

Yes, we scoffed the ridiculously high cost of gas, and drove all the way to Hatteras. But it was worth it! Windows down all the way, we took in the view of the beautiful seashore and were entertained by what is, apparently, the new frontier of wave riding--kite surfing. There is just something about breathing in that salty ocean air that makes summer complete. Charlie only wished we had taken his truck so that we could have driven out on the beach.

So, for the lighthouse...

Well, I won't even waste time listing the grade and comments for each category...it was given an A all the way around. Because as Charlie adamantly stated in response to my wavering between an A and a B, "This is history. You can't give history a B."

The Froggy Dog

Not to be confused with The Salty Dog, a popular waterfront dining establishment with great atmosphere and good food, The Froggy Dog was nothing of the sort. Sorry, Froggy, if you are reading, but I have to be honest with my readers. Here's how the Dog ranked on our scale:

Atmosphere: D. I couldn't ever quite put my finger on the smell, but it was kind of a great-grandmother's house meets elementary school cafeteria spray cleaner aroma. Although the restaurant was only a few yards from the water, the only view from the dining area was of the gravel parking lot.

Service: D. Our waitress was nice. She was also from another country. What country, you ask? Well, we might have picked up on an accent if we could have heard her. She whispered and mumbled her way through taking our order and scurried away from our table before we had the chance to ask any questions. We also didn't have the pleasure of meeting our silent server until about 15-20 minutes after we sat down.

Product (Food): D. So, I have to preface this one and say that Charlie and I probably should have made better choices in our selections. Charlie got a hot dog. A hotdog. At a seafood restaurant. At the beach. Don't ask me why. But I don't think he'll ever do it again. I tried to tell him that a 1/4 lb. hotdog was more hotdog than anyone should handle in one sitting, but he wouldn't listen.

Wish someone had told me that my crab sandwich was going to contain a whole deep-fried crab between 2 pieces of soggy bread. I would have listened.

The Downeast Rover Sunset Sail

One of the highlights of our trip, we set sail from the Manteo waterfront around 6:00 pm with our cooler and carryout.

Atmosphere: A. What could be better atmosphere than the beautiful Roanoke Sound at sunset? The captain said it was one of the best sails he'd ever had on this boat.

Service: A. The captain and first mate were friendly and laid back, but we also felt confident that they definitely knew what they were doing. There were a few times that I had white knuckles due to the white caps...but First Mate Marina (that was really her name--you know she's got to be good when her name is Marina) totally kept us from all going overboard.

Product (the sail): A. Nice boat. Good wind. Beautiful sunset. Romantic evening with my hubby of 6 years.

We have several more ratings from our trip (most of them positive), but this long post would get even longer. And I have laundry to do.

So this is the last one I'll tell you about. It tops the charts as an A++. Thank you for an amazing weekend, Charlie, just you and me! And wasn't it wonderful to come home to this?

happy mother's day

2008-05-11T19:58:00.004-04:00

I am blessed to be surrounded by many special moms. In the past few years many friends and my sister-in-law have become moms. I have learned from all of them. I am so appreciative to have them to walk alongside me as I have begun my journey through motherhood.

I am also thankful for my mother-in-law, Anne, or as so many of you know her as--Grannie Annie. I have felt treasured by her and part of her family ever since Charlie and I began dating. She has spoiled Emily and me as the daughters she never had...and I have not minded a bit! She raised three boys well...one of which I am especially partial to. Anne, thanks for teaching your son to love God, to be sensitive, to have a sense of humor, and to be a good shopping partner:-).

My Nannie is not just my Nannie--she's Nannie to many! She also raised three boys, all of whom she taught to be strong but gentle, to love the Lord with all their soul, mind, and strength, and to put family first. Nannie loves everyone. And loves them well. She is beautiful and despite the fact that she is now a great-grandmother, she is forever young! Nannie, thanks for giving Dad such a wonderful example of a parent to follow. And thanks for almost 29 years of hugs and kisses, lots of laughs, and your amazing cooking!

My Grandma died when I was in college. It makes me sad that she was not here to see me get married or to meet her great-granddaughter, but it makes me happy to know she is in Heaven with my Grandpa--living her eternal life with no pain....probably watching an extended marathon of Golden Girls. I remember her smile and her laugh and all the fun I had when I was with her.

I have always had an appreciation for my Mom (well, if you don't count 1990-1993, the middle school era). But since I have become a mom, that appreciation has grown ten-fold. Mom, thank you for being our taxi driver, for never missing a dance performance, awards ceremony, or cheerleading competition, for having dinnner on the table for us every night, for staying up late helping me with school projects, for encouraging me to be myself, for teaching me about the love of Christ, and for loving me unconditionally.

Love to all you moms!

rubber ducky, you're the one...

2008-05-11T19:30:00.003-04:00

you make bathtime lots of fun...

rubber ducky, i'm awfully fond of you!

like my friend, anna cate, i love my ducky! hers is named daphne. i just got this big one for my birthday, so she doesn't have a name yet. any ideas?

oops i forgot...

2008-05-03T22:14:00.000-04:00

I almost forgot the most fun and obnoxious part about being tagged...tagging someone else! So, Charlie, Shannon, Amy J., Heather, & Becca...go on, tell the world your 7 strange things!

On an unrelated, but totally much more important note...tonight is Maddie's Birthday Eve. And today happened to be her first birthday party. It was a pretty fun little shindig. I'll post more on that later.

Sweet birthday dreams, Doodle Bug! Tomorrow you will be One-Year-Old!

is your sister as cool as mine?

2008-05-06T22:24:00.003-04:00

after a long, kinda hard day and a little afternoon breakdown this is what i came home to: and this. field chunks are always the smart option. lily & dakota are thankful that they didn't have to go to bed hungry tonight. and these. maddie is thankful she didn't have to go to bed bare-bottomed tonight.
isn't she amazing? what would i do without this girl?

happy birthday day, madison grace

2008-05-04T21:09:00.035-04:00

we loved you before we knew you

for nine months we
prayed for you
dreamt about you
couldn’t wait for your arrival

your daddy
whispered your name against mommy’s tummy
laughed when he felt your strong feet kick

your mommy
sang lullabies, hoping you could hear
draped her hand across her belly, longing to hold you

and our love for you grew

april 23rd came and went
you waited
we waited
finally you came

may 4
on that day
our lily bloomed
daddy helped mommy stay calm
family and friends arrived
mommy cried
daddy cried
we cradled you in our arms
and looked into your eyes
and saw your little chest move to the rhythm that had greeted us at every weekly appointment
we thanked God for each tiny toe
and each tiny finger

on that day
God let us experience a miracle and our love for you grew

we buckled you in and brought you home

beautiful
delicate
you

we learned
to interpret cries
to swaddle
to rock
to feed
to stay awake
to stroke your forehead to put you to sleep
that you weren’t so fragile after all
and our love for you grew

days passed quickly
but slowly at the same time

in your first month you

celebrated
vacationed

were bathed

met new family and friends
picnicked
went to the doctor
cruised for dolphins
cheered for pirate baseball
rode a trolley
roadtripped
snuggled

and our love for you grew

summer days passed
into month two
did you know that you went to a summer soiree?

and that you shagged at a beach music concert with daddy?
and that you snored when you slept?
and that your smile made your sweet face even sweeter?

and our love for you grew

sparkles in the sky to celebrate month three

you always observed
noticed
paid close attention
to the green grass in front of the washington monument
to the sea of orange in the orioles stands
to the blue elephant on your bouncy seat
to your black dog and brown dog outside your window
to the dainty china cups at the o’henry tea time

the view was good
but you sensed there was more
so tired of staying put
in one place
so the rolling began
you rolled
and rolled
and rolled

and our love for you grew

salt water and sand
tickled toes and fingers
in your fourth month

naps on the beach
dips in the pool
walks during sunset

this is the life

your little round mouth
gave giggles and coos
music to our ears

in your round little mouth
we discovered 2 teeth
those sneaky little things
came in fast

and our love for you grew

month five brought many new things

new friends born and adopted
grayson and brent and conner
soon after came brooke and mac and mary elizabeth

new foods tasted
rice cereal and sweet potatoes and pears (to name a few)

new sounds made
“aaarrrggghhh” was a favorite (especially during football season)

new places visited
the fair and rockbridge

new daytime routine
aunt neen neen came to keep you

(another) new view
you sat up all by yourself

what a big girl
or big...chicken

and our love for you grew

the sixth month

you were young
you were restless
you took off
crawling
is
the coolest
you were
unstoppable
but

weren’t you just
a swaddled
cuddly
baby yesterday?

and our love for you grew

faster
and
faster
you crawled into month seven

your sweet and funny personality shined
through your expressions and your laugh
nothing sweeter
than the sound of your
giggle
and our love for you grew

more celebrations in month eight
Jesus’ birthday
and daddy’s birthday
colored lights and carols
christmas trees and wrapping paper
your big dark eyes took everything in

reaching for tree branches
reaching for the top of the crib (you pulled yourself up!)
reaching for your first baby doll
reaching up to be held by mommy or daddy

soon you will be
reaching for the stars

and our love for you grew

nine months of life
eight little teeth
seven cheerios on your tray
six books before bedtime (you love to read!)
five big gulps from your sippee cup that you held by yourself
four little friends on our small group weekend in the mountains
three yucky ear infections
two fun snow days
one favorite game…peek-a-boo

and our love for you grew

clapping
and
squealing
all the time

happy girl
bouncing girl
dancing girl

ten months passed
surprisingly quickly
then you surprised us
with a first step on your own
mostly, though, you hold finger tips
and cruise everywhere

and our love for you grew

eleven months already
your first birthday
right around the corner

and around the corner
you chase mommy and daddy
and we chase you
and you laugh
and laugh

now shy at first
you smile bashfully
and fold your little hands
a big grin follows
and sticks around

you were really sick
we were really sad
it broke our hearts to see
your pain

your pain
we pray
will always be comforted by God
you can trust in Him
and not be afraid
he has a plan for your life
a good plan
he loves you so much
and we do too

and our love for you grew

twelve months of life
joyful life
abundant life

life with you
is never dull

life with you
makes us thankful

life with you
reminds us to slow down
and notice the small things
along the way

you love people well
and you are well loved

shades of pink on a Sunday
pastel bonnet and dress
rosy cheeks
cotton candy lips
family and friends and church promised
to raise you in Christ we hear you say
bye
bah
wuh (wuff)
rah

we begin to count
you raise your arms to cheer
we raise our arms to cheer
repeat
and repeat
and repeat

our beautiful birthday girl
one year old today
we blinked
and twelve months passed
we thank God for you today
and every day

you
are
a
gift

with you
life is different
harder
better
you fit our family
perfectly
only you
fill that maddie-shaped hole
in our lives
in our hearts

and our love for you grows

hard to believe...

2008-04-30T23:37:00.004-04:00

that this tiny baby...

is almost one!

No year has ever passed more quickly than this one!

What a treasure each moment of this first year has been with our Madison Grace!

that thief (& my 7 strange things)

2008-04-26T23:31:00.001-04:00

Charlie used to have a little piece of paper taped to his dashboard. "Comparison is the thief of all joy." I think it is a Bill Goans quote. How true is that? Unfortunately, no matter how true I know it is, I still allow that little thief to get in. To my head. To my heart. And just steal away! What a weasel he is! I've always been susceptible to this subtle larceny. "I wish I was as thin as she is." "I wish I could dance like her." "I wish I could be as outgoing as she is." "I wish I was as spiritual as they are." "I wish my house were as beautiful as hers." "I wish I had her discipline." "And her haircut." "Ooh, and her shoes." Seriously!? I even compare my...uh, blogginess to others...wish I could be as consistent as Millie in documenting Maddie's days or as eloquent and witty as Emily or as creative as The Nester or as inspiring and impactful as Nate (I could go on an on--you can visit all my blogging friends from the links on the right). And now, I have a whole new party that the little thief shows up at...uninvited of course...motherhood! Really, I haven't been as bad as I thought I might. I think God's (and others') gentle reminders that every baby and every parent is so different has been helpful. The area where I struggle the most (and it's a lot) is being a working mom when the majority of my friends stay at home. Whew--yep, that's a hard one.

Anyway, now that you know my dark little comparison secret, I feel comfortable enough with you to share some more secrets. Forever ago, I was "tagged" by a friend and my sister. For all you blogosphere newcomers, apparently that means that I have to tell the world (or at least the 8 people that read this on a regular basis) 7 strange things about me. I definitely came up with more than 7, but I will spare you the list of 17. So, I know you've been waiting for it...in no particular order...drumroll please...

1. I like to mash up my food. Actually, only 2 foods. One is Life cereal. It simply must be mashed for me to eat it...well, at least for me to enjoy it. The other is peanut butter and banana. I like it piled high between two pieces of white bread and of course some of it "on the side" as I used to remind my mom when I was little. It's gross, I know, but it sure is tasty! On another food note, I love the combo of chocolate cake and orange juice--mmm-mmm!

2. My top front teeth are kind of fake. My friend Whitney and I share this as a common bond. I think hers are all the way fake, though. Several years ago, I got veneers over my 6 front teeth--think of them as slipcovers for your pearly whites if you will. It was partly due to my bite being affected because they were too short and partly because I wanted them whitened. The end result was quite nice, but it was a pretty traumatic experience. (Note #1: When the dentist tells you not to look in the mirror when you go to the restroom in the middle of a procedure, DON'T DO IT! Note#2: When the dentist tries to give you a temporary dental fixture and tells you that they will hold up fine until the permanent ones are completed, DON'T BELIEVE HIM! This is a lie! Your fake, temporary teeth with crack and crumble in public and you will have to hold them in with denture cream!) I also learned through the whole ordeal, that I have a "gummy smile", as was used to describe my mouth situation by two different dentists. Go ahead, you have my permission to look at my gummy smile the next time you see me.

3. Not only did I have short teeth, but I also have short legs. They are disproportionate to my body which is why it makes finding pants a chore! They've been a barrier not only in fitting rooms, but also in many a dance class. That is why I considered it a most high compliment when one of my teachers in college yelled above the music, "Travel! Use that floor space! Look at Kelly with her short legs go--good girl!" I am afraid Maddie has inherited this gene too. Although I must say the short-leg look is good for her. Just look at her--she sure is cute!

4. I am a bit...how should I say...challenged when it comes to riding a bike (my friend Blair can empathize, as she notes on her blog). I kept my lack of bike-riding skills hidden for a long, long time. Many years of my life I just "preferred to walk" when I received the invitation to bike. I avoided it and my cover was not blown...until we took a group of high school kids for a week-long adventure camp in California. Of all the adventures one could choose to make a part of that week, someone had to choose mountain biking. I've got a word for it and adventure ain't it. Anyway, it's not that I completely did not know how to ride a bike...I learned when I was a kid...sort of. I don't know if I had a bad fall or what, but one day I just decided it was not for me and didn't ride again after that...until my training. Yep, we spent many a late night practicing in empty parking lots before our trip. God bless my husband...my trainer...may you have the same patience teaching Madison as you had with me. Because I will not be subjecting myself to that two-wheel torture again.

5. Remember Language Arts? I was a fan. Not so much of the literature part (although I do love to read), but more of the grammar, spelling, sentence structure, penmanship part. For some reason, just as numbers just make sense to some people, prepositions, periods, and palindromes have always been my forte. I used to love dissecting sentences and bad grammar is a pet peeve of mine (now I am beginning to worry that this sentence is not grammatically correct!).

6. I like to peel things. If paint has dried in the paint tray, I'll be peeling it out the next day. If glue has dribbled down the side of the bottle, I'm on it. And the happiest peeling opportunity--the aftereffect of a bad sunburn. Again, God bless my husband. He has fallen victim to my peeling obsession more than a few times.

7. I am a pseudo-organized person. That is, I would love to say that I am an organized person (as I believe it is most certainly a virtue), but if I did I'd probably kind of lying. The truth is that I long for a life of order and organization. I don't think there's anything wrong with my expectations, but I find myself falling into the "if only" trap too often. "If only I could just get _____ organized, I'd be able to ____________." So, while everything in my house has a place and I am good with a calendar (most of the time), I am far from the organized woman I would like to be. However, those little things that I do manage to get under control--now they are a big deal. I'm talking about cd's-arranged-in-alphabetical-order-by-artist-and-release-date big. Very important--no crucial--to the daily functions of a household. I'm talking clothes-hanging-in-the-closet-according-to-type-of-clothing-then-by-sleeve/pant/skirt-length crucial. I have more of these obsessions, but, alas, I must leave part of me a mystery!

Well, if you have stuck with me to the end of this long post, you are truly my friend. And you deserve a gold star. Or a cookie. Or maybe some chocolate cake and orange juice.

And if you are thinking about playing some cruel joke on me next time you come over by messing with my cd's, don't even try it.

giving her back

2008-04-26T21:00:00.007-04:00

"I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he will be given over to the LORD."

~1 Samuel 1:27-28

I've always had a hard time with the story of Abraham and Isaac. And now that I have a child, understanding it has become even harder. God asks a dad to journey with his only little boy up to a mountain top where he is commanded to take his life. Why would our loving God ask such a horrible act from his servant Abraham? The crazy thing is that Abraham was obedient! He did it! (can you sense my self-doubt that I would follow through in the same way?) Well, he didn't really do it...he didn't end up having to...but he was prepared to do it.

So, as we dedicated Madison to the Lord last Sunday, I've thought about this near-tragic event that occured so many years ago. I can imagine an old man whose youth has been rejuvenated by the energy, curiousity, and playfulness of his young son. Their journey may have begun with conversation and maybe some laughter, but I bet with every mile, Abraham's heart becomes heavier. I imagine that, as they neared the place where the sacrifice would be made, Abraham is overcome with weariness--not so much from traveling, but from his torment within. I can imagine his face, the dirt from a three-day journey streaked by tears that flow silently and forcefully when his son asks him,

" Father...the wood and the fire are here...but where is the lamb for the burnt offering?"

(Gen. 22:7)

Just as God spoke to Abraham that day...as he taught him...as he protected him...God uses this story to speak to and to teach me. I can make sense of this incomprehendible request by knowing that God wants me to know He is sovereign. That He not only sees, but orchestrates the bigger picture. That His requests of us might seem crazy. Irrational. Non-conforming to the world. Like asking us to move to another country where we will be separated from family, friends, and all that is familiar, in order to share Christ with "the nations," as my sister is doing. Or asking us to trust Him admist what might the greatest tragedy imaginable, losing a child, as dear friends of mine experienced recently. Somehow I think Abraham had glimpse of God's big picture. He told this to the guys that were traveling with him,

"We will worship and then we will come back to you."

(Genesis 22:5b, emphasis mine)

Even though he was prepared to do what God had told him to do, I think he believed God would extend His protection and His mercy and that, in some way, God would allow him to return with his son. I am challenged by Abraham to be faithful. obedient. trusting. So, as we dedicate Madison to the Lord, may we do it daily. With faithfulness, obedience, and trust.

winter to spring

2008-03-24T12:23:00.000-04:00

ring around the...roseola?!

2008-03-23T23:39:00.010-04:00

I feel a twinge of guilt writing about these last few challenging days with Madison when we have had several wonderful months with her that I have neglected to blog about. But, maybe I can provide a recap of those fun times some time soon (as I pledged to my blog, I am going to try to post more frequently). I decided to write about this nasty little visitor to our family for two reasons: 1. to let all of our family & friends know that there was finally a diagnosis given for the funk that Maddie has had since Wednesday (thanks to all of you for your prayers and calls to check on her); and, 2. to acknowledge how grateful we are for Madison's incredibly easy temperament (as we have seen the other side of that these past few days).

When a prickly pink rash showed up today all over Madison's face, chest, and back, after three days of a high fever (over 104 at times!), I did what any 21st century mom would do...I googled it. My findings outlined her symptoms almost exactly--unusually high fever for 3-5 days, red or swollen eyelids, lethargic, and the development of a rash following the fever. I called her doctor, and he immediately confirmed the diagnosis. So, at least there is a name for the misery that our sweet girl has endured these past few days. Somehow that helps...me at least. Probably doesn't do much to console her. Hopefully she will be back to her normal self in the next few days. Like any other virus, it just has to run its course.

And that course has not been a very cheerful one. My heart has ached for her during these past few days, especially as the high fever lingered. Her little moans and her blazing hot skin kept me on the verge of tears. There are not many things more pitiful than a sick baby. When I talked to Madison's pediatrician today he asked me if she had become increasingly more fussy now than when she had the fever. Um, yeah. My little bright-eyed baby who seems to keep a smile on her face and a laugh on her lips...who is forever bouncing, exploring, and playing...has spent these last days either curled in a sleeping ball or in inconsolable tears. We've always known that Madison's temperament has given us a relatively easy run as first-time parents, but after a couple days of what feels like constant fussiness, we recognize more than ever how good we have it.

So, thanks, Roseola, for a bit of perspective. Now, please leave us alone!

the little patient...post-chest x-ray, bloodwork, and antibiotic shot (notice where daddy signed her "cast") "mommy's cell phone sure helps me feel better!"

easter morning...she may be sick but she still sure is cute!

blog apology

2008-03-23T23:33:00.002-04:00

Dear Friend,

I hope you will find it in your heart to forgive me. I have left you all alone for so long. It's not that I haven't thought about you...on the contrary, everytime I enjoyed others' creative ramblings and entertaining updates, it was you I thought of. I never once forgot your address or what you looked like. And when my Favorites faithfully offered your name as a choice to visit, I regretably turned a blind eye and scrolled down to engage in more important appointments...with "Online Banking," "Work E-mail," and other obligatory relationships. I just could not seem to spare the moments to visit you, to share my thoughts with you. It is quite sad that my friends had to threaten to kidnap me and lock us together in a room for me to finally visit you again. I hope that you will pardon my neglect and I promise to try to spend more time with you from now on.

Sincerely,
Kelly

his 29th birthday

2007-12-12T21:58:00.000-05:00

reasons why i love this birthday boy:

1. he loves Jesus & his family & his friends with his whole heart.

2. he holds my hand and prays every night before we go to sleep.

3. he is passionate about living.

4. he practices what he preaches.

5. he sings in front of high school kids every week. he sings for me sometimes.

6. he drives while i sleep. if he needs directions when he drives, he asks.

7. he changes diapers without complaint (drama, yes, but no complaining).

8. his fingers do a funny wiggle when he claps.

9. he likes to dance. he smiles at me and his eyes sparkle when we dance. and he does a mean "dirty bird" (if you have not witnessed this, you must ask him to demonstrate immediately).

10. he cries. not too much. not too little.

11. he can make a complete stranger feel like a friend.

12. he loves where he comes from. trucks. mud. the whole 9.

13. he smiles in photos. and while i'm talking about photography, he knows how to take a picture.

14. he goes to artsy things with me (and usually enjoys it!).

15. he watches america's next top model & so you think you can dance with me (and always enjoys it!).

16. he appreciates me as a wife and a mom. he never makes me feel like i don't do enough.

17. he knows how to build and fix things.

18. he almost always feeds our dogs at night.

19. he goes to the counter to order kids meals for us at fuddruckers. i am afraid of the counter because they may discover we are not under 12.

20. he doesn't hessitate to give someone in need the $20 in his pocket when he feels a nudge from the Lord.

21. he acts like i am not crazy even when i act crazy.

22. he listens to christmas music when i am in the car because he knows i love it (even though he definitely does not love it).

23. he mows the grass. he doesn't mow the grass on sundays. he encourages me to rest on sundays...and other days.

24. he tells me he loves me several times a day.

25. he gets choked up when he talks about wanting his high school friends to know Jesus.

26. he helps me believe that i am beautiful.

27. he makes me laugh...and laugh...and laugh...and laugh some more.

28. he tells me that, when he is with me and maddie, there's nowhere else he'd rather be.

29. i know he means it.

happy birthday, my sweet charlie.

a season ending (part 2)

2007-10-01T20:15:00.000-04:00

Well, a month has passed and I'm just now posting part 2. Such is the life of a working mom.

Here's a photo re-cap of our first summer as a family of three...

"aaahhh...i love the beach!"

"aaggghhh! i hate the beach!"

maddie's first boatride with daddy

putt-putt with friends...madison was good luck--i got a hole in one!

a walk in the bog garden with momma lu & granddaddy

baseball & a bottle with grannie annie & grandpa

happy fourth of july!

littlest orioles fan

tour of dc...the abridged version

hanging out with uncle jimmy

three friends at the lake

madison's 1st tea party (with mommy & momma lu)

a visit to virgina to see aunty sara

aunt neen-neen sure makes good coffee!

that's my name

a week at the beach...what a great way to end an amazing summer!